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  • TIM HORTONS DISCOVERS CANADIANS EXIST AFTER DUNKIN’ ANNOUNCES RETURN


  • MILLIONS LOST AFTER INVESTOR DISCOVERS “BETTING ON GLOBAL EVENTS” IS NOT THE SAME AS MANIFESTING THEM


  • Site C Dam Officially Complete, Still Arguing With Itself About Whether It’s Good Or Evil


  • Canada Declared “Happiest Place On Earth” By Graphics With Suspiciously Identical Fonts


  • War, Diplomacy and Other Global Mysteries…


  • NDP Sounds Alarm on Dying in ERs — But Newcomers Score Free Supplemental Perks (Physio, Dental, Vision, Mental Health) That Albertans Pay Extra For… With MAID as the Federal “Option” Nobody Asked For


  • Province Declares Itself Morally Incompatible With App, Will Communicate Via Vibes Going Forward


  • Local Pizza Joint Accidentally Enters Provincial Politics After Allowing Humans Inside


  • Paul’s Pizza Review-Bombed After Displaying Wrong Sticker — Internet Declares “War on Dough”


  • Viral Account ‘Libs of TikTok’ Accused of Terrible Crime: Quoting People Accurately

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